The fact that you feel offended does not necessarily mean you are right.
Many people believe that if they feel offended, it is because someone has insulted them in some way. Well, they might be right. Probably someone has intentionally (or unintentionally) offended them if they feel this way.
But in most cases, if you feel offended by something or someone, you should probably wonder where you were 'wrong' to start with, not the person who offended you.
What does this say about you personally, and how exactly did the other person manage to gain this kind of influence over your feelings, to the point of making you feel offended?
You see, the truth is you get offended only by things you refuse to truly acknowledge and accept about yourself. There is no way someone can make you feel offended if there are no parts of you that are scared to be fully seen and felt.
In some situations, the other person is actually doing you a service by 'offending' you. The purpose is to help you reown your own inner power faster and take accountability for who you truly are.
If you are truly transparent, authentic, and real with yourself, you will actually just laugh when someone even tries to offend you. It will simply not work on you. You will see clearly what the other person is trying to do and why. You will know that it has absolutely nothing to do with you, and it will naturally bounce back to the person who is trying to offend you.
You will not feel offended. Your inner emotional landscape will probably remain the same. But the other person might get very frustrated with you if their technique to offend you didn't work.
When they realize that what they were triggered about is actually about them and not about you, they might have a harder time dealing with their own emotions at that moment.
This is like sending an arrow of judgment to someone and receiving it back in our face at the same time. If the other person remains calm and untouched by our insults, we might be even more confused.
It hurts, and we feel naively overplayed. We might get angry or even scared if we are not used to being responded to so efficiently to our own ignorant criticism and capacity to offend others.
Judgment is interesting.
Try to offend someone without using your judgment. Could you?
Try to live a life with no judgments, can you?
In simple terms, judgment is the process of forming an opinion or evaluation by discerning and comparing.
Your ability to judge is mandatory for your survival and for the further evolution of your consciousness.
Judgment is a completely internalized and highly personalized mental process. You evaluate and compare things in your own perception and within the limits of your own brain or human experience.
Because your judgment is the product of your own unique mental construct, it can actually talk with accuracy only about you and your own personal experience.
From a scientific point of view, your judgment is literally worthless and useless if you use it to evaluate or discern the truth of someone else.
This is like saying: I know better than the other person where everything in their house is and why they have placed things this way, even if I have never seen their actual house. I know better than them what is right and what is wrong about them or their habitable space; therefore, I am entitled to judge them.
This makes no sense.
This is called self-ignorance and a very bad use of your judgment to become a better human being yourself.
Your judgment is a tool for your inner personal development and modification of your own current system of beliefs. It is not a tool to be used on others or externally from your own self-perceived reality or limits of your personal consciousness.
Your opinion cannot be as valuable or as accurate as the one from the person who actually lives there and has been the one to place each single object in its place. Your personal judgment about someone else's behavior or life doesn't mean anything. It only talks about you, and it should also mean something only to you.
When you use your judgment to judge the personal reality of others, you actually create a very complex distortion in our collective relational system. You try to impose some parts of your personal system of beliefs on others and plant them there for some reason, like wild 'seeds of awareness' in their consciousness.
But have you ever wondered if maybe the seeds of your awareness are actually not compatible with the forest and soil the other person has inside their head right now?
Maybe the seeds of your judgment are so incompatible that they might even destroy the entire conscious forest in the mind of the other person if you continue to unconsciously judge them with your 'conscious' opinions and unrequested 'guidance' in the form of cheap criticism.
Your judgment is a very powerful tool for your personal inner evolution and self-realization. If you know how to use it properly, you can become free from most of the suffering you experience very easily and very efficiently.
When it is used to impose your truth on others or judge them in some way, it loses its purpose and actually creates a lot of harm in our shared field of consciousness.
You can be certain to receive back all the arrows of judgment you have sent externally in your face at some point.
Judgment is a mirror of your own unique consciousness. If you project that mirror onto others and make it about them, how exactly are you serving them in that situation? Or yourself?
It's like giving a technical instruction manual of your kitchen blender to help someone fix their coffee machine. How is it useful?
It is not. It's just confusing and even mean for no reason.
They might at some point bring you back your instruction book and tell you it is useless and does not work for them. And now you will start to be very confused about why your book is wrong and did not work to fix their problem. You might even start questioning the validity of your own book. At that point, you might become very confused about your own judgments and how right or wrong they are.
But all of that could have been avoided if you were smart enough to keep your judgments about yourself and not offer them to others like candies to start with. This would have been more productive and less confusing for both you and the other person.
The other person would have probably figured out how to fix their coffee machine without your useless book. And you would have probably not questioned if your book is okay or not. You would know that it is okay for you and in your personal reality but meaningless for everyone else that doesn't live in your body and your head.
If you use your judgment as an internal process about your personal consciousness, you will very quickly understand many mysteries about life and greatly evolve as a human being.
If you use your judgment to evaluate, analyze, or create an opinion about the personal reality of someone else, your own judgment will make you suffer in ways you could not even dream or suspect.
This will come back to you in the form of a very clever boomerang one day or another.
And it will probably come to you when you would expect it the least. And maybe then you would be pleased to understand the real value and meaning of the very precious and powerful tool of judgment when applied for the right purpose and in the right place.
When you see judgment as an exclusively inner and internalized process, you cannot really offend people. If they do feel somehow offended, it probably has nothing to do with you (if you are certain you have not consciously or unconsciously judged them at some point).
But if you do offend people for real with your judgments, just know that you are actually talking about yourself, and by projecting this onto others, you lose more and more inner power to actually see or acknowledge it in your own personal consciousness.
Know that every judgment you have made that has created suffering for others will come back to you one way or another.
One day, you will see the authentic reflection of yourself in this very deep and very confusing mirror of your own judgments and its actual importance for your own further evolution.
When the time is right, you will realize the truth of what the seeds of your judgments planted in the hearts of other people actually do to your own soul.
And once you do have this realization in your head for real, you will most likely stop judging other people or their personal experience, which you most likely know nothing about anyway.
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