From Pain to Joy (Part 4)

Some addictions are primarily mental or behavioral. Some are not even rooted in drugs, toxins, or psychoactive substances but stem from profound inner emotions, repressed desires, or a habitual reliance on harmful, limiting beliefs about oneself and our shared world.

Many individuals find themselves addicted to patterns of action or seeking external validation. Some are addicted to love, attention, or sex. Many, without realizing it, are enslaved by a deep addiction to unconditional love itself. This addiction shapes their lives, causing their nervous systems to react in unpredictable ways, yet they fail to connect the dots meaningfully or coherently.

Love manifests in countless forms, unseen shapes, and unique expressions. It turns us into addicts of different things, pulling us toward endless variations of itself. At its core, every addiction traces back to one root cause: love. There is nothing else. It has always been, and will always be, about our deep, visceral, and raw passion for life itself and deep love (or the perceived luck of it).

As humans, we consciously chose to suffer and experience pain with a seemingly foolish intent: to learn how to love each other more deeply, more expansively, and more innocently for as long as possible.

Love drives us mad, makes us reckless, and renders us unpredictable. It terrifies the most vulnerable parts of our beings yet transcends and transforms us, exploding magically across all realms where our souls wander—or have yet to go.

Love is dangerous.

And yet, despite its risks, you will still give up everything for it. You will choose love, even if only for an instant, even if it doesn’t even seem to be fully real. You will embrace it even when knowing it has the potential to dismantle your inner world and create a mess in your external life. The subtle scent of love drives you crazy, and you will never stop chasing it.

Love is omnipresent, forever mysterious, and eternally elusive to conscious awareness or our rational understanding. You are a prisoner of love, caught in its games—and you enjoy it deeply. Even when love is profoundly painful and confusing, you forgive. You surrender to the wisdom of innocent foolish love over and over again.

You let go. You give in. You open up. You fly out.

You contract. You expend. You breathe. You trust.

You awaken.

And you remember: it was all for love.

You trusted the instinctual whispers in the depths of your bones. Your heart simply knew.

While your entire reality and eternal existence may confuse you, love never does. You know it in your soul and the endless reaches of your heart. Your pure innocence is immune to confusion, corruption, or manipulation by the powers of this world.

Love is carefree because she knows the endgame, no matter the scenario or strategy. She plays for fun, knowing there is nothing else but her.

Love always wins.

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One of the most tangible, physical manifestations of our love for each other is the sexual drive or desire we feel toward others. This almost primal, animalistic attraction to get closer—to taste, to smell, and to connect with another body—is often beyond our rational control or conscious intention. The chemistry of sex and love is wild, deeply unconscious, and fascinating on many levels. In fact, pheromones could be considered nature’s own legitimate drugs and very powerful alchemists.

Your inner biology houses countless wild magicians, exquisite chemical molecules and unimaginable mysteries.

Hormones, for instance, have an incredible ability to control behavior, influence emotions, shape awareness, and even govern thoughts. They wield enormous authority over your inner power and your personal experience. Hormones can be your greatest allies, guiding you toward joy and vibrant health—or they can make life deeply challenging, creating suffering and confusion.

When your hormones are balanced and content, you experience a state of pure joy and optimal health. But when they’re dysregulated, even the simplest aspects of life can feel disjointed, and making sense of reality becomes an uphill battle.

Hormones are extraordinarily powerful.

They influence all dimensions of human experience simultaneously—physical, emotional, mental, and even spiritual. These magical communicators, harmonizers, and transporters are the orchestrators of our inner systems, working across multiple layers of existence.

Interestingly, many of our addictions can be traced back to the dysfunction and dysregulation of our hormonal systems. Our bodies are so full of toxins and imbalances that we’ve forgotten what true harmony with our own nature feels like. It seems almost impossible for our souls to even dream of such systemic balance, or it just still scares us way too much.

Addiction becomes a coping mechanism—a desperate attempt to restore temporary coherence within our overwhelmed bodies or to compensate for deeper internal issues (or some complex unprocessed trauma content in our nervous system).

We lack the knowledge and tools to manage or honor our hormones responsibly and pleasurably. As a result, we fall victim to their unchecked power, helplessly caught in automatic, programmed behaviors.

Among all addictions, sex is perhaps the most obvious and intriguing to explore.

I’ll spare you the statistics, but it’s no secret that, as a global society, culture, and even species, we are collectively addicted to sex or the sexual energy in countless creative ways. This addiction has deeply distorted our collective psyche, and we all still suffer because of it.

It’s not just religion or spirituality that has burdened us with shame and misinformation about sex; science, politics, economics, and society have also contributed to this distortion. Every sub-community has imposed its own fears, judgments, or shame surrounding sexual energy and its authentic powers.

If you think the mass manipulation surrounding drugs is harmful, you’ve only scratched the surface of the damage caused by the suppression and distortion of sexuality in our collective system of beliefs.

Your sexuality, innate creativity, and inner intimacy with your own creative power have been systematically manipulated for control and used as a very clever strategy for social abuse. Unacknowledged desires and unconscious fears are the most effective tools for manipulation and control.

The idea of forbidden pleasure (or unwanted fear) is a powerful motivator—one of the easiest ways to sell anything in any form to anyone. The more accurately your deepest desires and insecurities are identified, the more easily they can be monetized.

Worse still, by leveraging your repressed desires or unrecognized fears, society or economy can make you believe anything they want, provided it satisfies some shadowy, unmet need for pleasure or a sense of security of yours—no matter how fleeting or superficial they are.

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Sex was shamed by us—by our own human nature and our resistance to unwanted emotional suffering—not by God or the Creator.

It’s our jealousy, our sense of entitlement to possession of others, and our obsession with attachments or idolised love that have planted the seeds of deep fears around sexuality and its unlimited energetic potential. It’s about our own craziness and ignorance, not the sacredness of sex or its prohibition by God.

It’s about our self-delusion—that love or desire can be contained, controlled, or numbed. It’s about our fears of the limitless experience of life.

The inventors of deep sex-shame and sex-fear were probably the same beings who created patriarchy and oppressed half the population for no reason. They were sad cowards who had no idea how to express their innate power or creativity other than by oppressing the women around them. They were likely insecure humans in deep emotional pain, drowning in misery over love and tenderness.

They didn’t understand that we can simply ask for love—and sometimes, receive it unconditionally. We don’t need to fight for it, force it, or protect it. We don’t need to make women weak or miserable to feel powerful ourselves. We don’t need to control them to be loved, honored, or sexually desired.

The more we give women the space to be authentically themselves—completely free, wild, and unforgivably creative—the more loyal, committed, and dedicated they become in relationships. Unconditional freedom often leads to a deeper desire for attachment and intimacy, even exclusivity, as a natural outcome in a partnership between two people who can unconditionally accept each other exactly as they are.

The more you respect and accept your woman as she is, the more you will become the best—and only—one in her heart. The more you empower her happiness, the more she will empower you in return. She will ignite your confidence, light your passion, unlock your inner wisdom, and expand your heart and soul into boundless kindness and compassion for humanity.

And obviously, this is not really about genders. All of this is true for men too.

By truly honoring the innate creative power of our men and accepting them unconditionally for their authenticity and vulnerability, we may discover that most of them are far more responsible, powerful and kinder than we had convinced ourselves to believe. It takes two to tango, and respect is always a two-way river.

The guiding music for your dance is always love.

Love can show you the God in you and in everyone else around you.

Love can realize your deepest dreams and satisfy your wildest desires.

Love can transform your eternal spirit in all the ways you wish.

Love can offer all of this to you effortlessly—but only if you stop seeing her as dangerous, inferior, or unworthy of your attention. If you have the courage to let love show you her true potential, she will create beauty, coherence, and meaning in this world, seemingly by magic.

The same is true for women in general, even when they are not our personal romantic or sexual partners.

Woman can collaborate with you to make your shared reality overflow with pleasure, bliss, and joy. If you power up with her, instead of overpowering her, you’ll realize she was always on your team, never against you. You are where you are because of the women who crossed your path and supported you along the way.

And the same is true for men as well. We are who we are because of the powerful, wonderful, kind, and amazing men in our lives who already deeply love us, respect us, and support us no matter what.

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Our shame around sex originates in our fears of our own sexual energy, creative power, potential for authentic attraction, and our natural capacity to fulfill the deep desires of another.

We’re scared of not being loved enough—or not being enough for love. Out of this innocent, mundane fear, we’ve spun elaborate stories in our minds. We’ve convinced ourselves that we need to achieve something heroic or change who we are to be worthy of love and desire.

We’ve created countless conditions, rules, and requirements, convincing ourselves that love must be earned, worked for, or deserved. We’ve made it convoluted and confusing because the simplicity of true love terrifies us deeply.

We’ve conditioned, censored, and limited our emotions, relationships, desires, and even basic needs. It feels safer this way—more familiar, more comfortable. Sometimes, our known fears feel closer to the heart and less threatening to the mind than the unknown and uncertain experience of unconditional and boundless love.

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Sexual addiction is both intense and complex.

It stirs one of the most powerful creative energies within us. This immense potential affects your entire system more deeply than you realize. It can either be harnessed consciously to manifest your dreams or left unchecked, leading to unintended destruction in your entire life.

Sex itself isn’t “bad” or sinful. Sex is extraordinary and amazing.

However, disrespectful, harmful, or unconscious sex can be dangerous and unfulfilling for everyone involved. Exploring pleasure freely and engaging safely with sexual energy can be incredibly exciting, nourishing, healing, and expansive for both soul and body.

Sex can even be a spiritual experience, deeply interconnected, whether shared with a partner, a stranger, or oneself. It doesn’t always require physical intercourse or sex-driven activities to access its transformative power.

There are countless ways to play with and explore sexuality. Tapping into your innate creativity and inner power is one of the most enjoyable and profound. Living a passionate, purposeful life is another way to channel this energy into something meaningful.

Sexual energy extends far beyond the bedroom or late-night intimacy.

It’s the energy that fuels your career, vitality, health, life force, deepest desires for our shared reality, and even the evolution of your consciousness.

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Severely repressed creativity at a societal level often leads to imbalances and dysfunctions in how individuals express their sexual energy.

When someone learns to channel this powerful creative energy naturally into other areas of their life—be it through art, innovation, or meaningful pursuits—they often feel less reliant on its physical expressions, like sex. In these cases, the energy transforms into a deeply fulfilling force and power, reducing dependency or addiction to purely sexual outlets.

People addicted to pornography are often highly creative individuals who struggle to safely and effectively express their creativity in the external world. They end up discharging this untapped potential through other means, and masturbation becomes one of the simplest strategies to achieve this. Sexual stimulation is, indeed, a remarkable tool for moving, transforming, or generating immense amounts of energy within us.

This process, when approached consciously, can lead to a taste of divine pleasure—something extraordinary and transcendent.

It’s when you become fully aware of your creative power, mastering its movement within you, that you can freely share this unreal joy with others. It’s also when you can surrender to another’s energy, trusting unconditionally, allowing yourself to be deeply penetrated by their essence—body, mind, and soul.

This opens you to receiving boundless pleasure within your sacred self, fearlessly, again and again.

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How did we make love to each other in the past, during peaceful, carefree, joyful times? Were we in an endless orgy under open skies with everything that moved? Likely not.

We sang. We danced. We created art, literature, spirituality and science with our very powerful sexual energy of creation. We explored, travelled, wandered, and experimented with life and nature in countless forms. We have built entire civilizations and complex social structures. Through our passions, inspirations, and intuitions, we expressed our sexuality and creative power to the world. We made love to reality itself.

We were cocreators.

And sometimes, conscious cocreators enjoyed pleasurable, intimate sex too. But even then, the experience was different when rooted in pure intention, innocent awareness, genuine connection, and authentic presence. Sex, in such moments, became the most magical, powerful, and healing force.

When used wisely and consciously as a tool for cocreation, sex can create miracles filled with fun, genuine joy and pure excitement.

To embrace or heal from a perceived addiction to sex, you must tend to the parts of yourself that were denied creativity, expression, and uniqueness of your soul. You must revive the “artist” within before you can honor your sexuality freely and its immense power.

You must learn to experience blissful pleasure in the most mundane aspects of life.

Feeling ecstasy from the simplicity of a delicious meal. Finding orgasmic joy in walking through a cold rain. Being deeply moved inside by the voice or touch of a stranger. Feeling aroused by a passionate project or a dream meeting. All these moments are part of being a sexual, sensitive, fully present cocreator of reality.

We can channel our energy, power, and creativity in countless ways, finding euphoric, even orgasmic pleasures in every living moment. The more we diversify and adapt how we use our sexual energy, the healthier, happier, and more fulfilled we can become. As a result, our shared reality grows more meaningful, coherent, and harmonious for all.

Sex addiction isn’t truly an addiction. It’s not even a “problem.” No one has ever died from making too much love or pleasuring themselves too often.

When sex becomes an “addiction,” it’s rarely about the act of sex itself. Instead, it reflects a profound struggle to express creativity and inner power without fear, shame, or judgment.

When we fail to playfully and responsibly engage with the creative sexual energy of life itself everywhere and anytime, we risk dysfunction—not only in intimacy with others but also within ourselves.

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In this intricate dance of thoughts, where fear and liberation, trust and betrayal, survival and surrender collide, we are invited to see the threads that bind us. These threads are not only woven through our individual lives but across time, through histories that never truly end but always evolve.

Perhaps we can never fully escape the shadow of the past, but the choice remains—do we allow these shadows to define us, or do we, in our deepest knowing, rise to create light where there once was none?

The challenge before us is not just to heal, but to heal with the wisdom of our shared experiences and with authentic compassion in our hearts.

It is the acceptance of our wounds, not as weaknesses, but as the very roots of transformation and sources for our innate powers and unique creative potential. In understanding that healing is not linear, but cyclical and systemic, we embrace the truth that even the most broken of us holds the potential for true regeneration and complete healing.

The journey is long, sometimes unbearably so, but each step taken in the name of genuine love, in the name of wisdom, unfolds a new possibility for what it means to live authentically.

So, as we look ahead, let us remember that within our struggles lie the seeds of co-creation, and within every fracture, there is space for something profound to emerge.

It is not the absence of pain that defines freedom, but the presence of love—of deep, unwavering unconditional love—for ourselves, for one another, and for the vastness of all that is yet to be healed.

The future is not written in certainty, but in the choices we make today, to honor, to connect, to trust, and to simply be human together.