Letter to You

Who are we?

Who am I? You? Us?

Why is it so complicated? Why couldn’t it be simple?

Why do I get so lost in my own stories? What does it even mean cocreate with Life? What is attunement?

What does my heart truly feel? What do I repress? About what am I being stubborn? To what part of myself am I afraid to die? What am I scared of?

Pleasure.

Hm. This is interesting. What do you mean?

You see the potential in pleasure. You don’t fully trust the container.

You already know that part of your experience is to remember how to actually enjoy life. Your challenge is to learn how to receive pleasure and how to share your pleasure through creative expression. You understand the alchemy between suffering and pleasure. You understand the powerful relationship between pleasure and creativity.

You were deeply wounded in both. In your creative power and in your capacity to simply enjoy the pleasure of being alive.

Pleasure is a very interesting and controversial topic.

This is a very powerful tool that only a very skillful master can play with.

Pleasure is intimate. Pleasure is deep. Pleasure is the complete surrender.

Suffering and pleasure are the same. Both sides of the same coin. You repress one, you repress the other one too. A life with no suffering and no pleasure is meaningless. Because the invisible net between us is woven mainly of those two things.

Love is something that is structured in the field in shapes and forms that express themselves through suffering and pleasure. Desire and Denial. Low or Up. Alive or Frozen.

Yes, you can be neutral.

No pleasure and no suffering. But you also don’t actually create anything really. You don’t generate new energy in your system in order to put it into something else. In order to create something meaningful from the energy you already hold in your system.

It’s almost like you want to light a big fire but you have no wood to put into it. Because you have already stripped yourself from all the desires and all the pains.

Your pleasure and your suffering are the wood. This is the resource that is required to engage yourself in a real inner alchemy.

If you want to create for real, you need to learn how to suffer and how to have pleasure wisely.

Differently put, you need to master the resources management and optimize the overall process of transformation of raw energy into the creation.

You need to be crystal clear what kind of fire do you want and be honest with yourself what kind of wood do you have? What are you going to burn? What desires will power your creative project? What suffering are you willing to consciously process to feed your fire?

We don’t choose between pleasure or suffering. Good or bad. Lovely or Scary. Comfortable or not. Black or white.

We choose the amplitude and the richness of the experience. Not its qualities.

Its qualities are emerging properties that are simply resources for you to process and use to create something else. Life gives you the wood. No matter if it is a desire or suffering, you take it. You say thank you. And you feed your inner fire with it. This fire gives you the energy to create more.

More you practice and more woods you see and experience. More you will intuitively understand the subtle mechanisms at work between pleasure and suffering. You will understand that anything can be both. And it’s your choice. Every single experience can be pleasurable. Even in deep pain.

A real master of fire doesn’t judge the wood by its emotional quality or vibration. She understands the uniqueness of the resource she is dealing with and its potential to fuel the inner fire of transformation. For her it’s pleasant and enjoyable no matter the perceived quality of the wood. Because her authentic pleasure is in the fire, not in the wood. Her destination is the creation. Not the desires.

…

Pleasure and relief are not the same.

Relief makes the actual wood perish. You decrease the quantity and the quality of the raw resources for your fire. You don’t create big things with a fire from rotten wood.

Relief creates fogginess between pleasure and suffering. It creates confusion and makes the overall process of transformation highly inefficient and potentially very painful.

Relief doesn’t make you feel what is. Relief makes you feel what you want to feel.

You interfere in the process. You believe that by altering and controlling your feelings you will have a more beautiful and powerful fire. This is not true. This is not how it works.

The creation doesn’t emerge from what you want to feel. Creation emerges from what is felt.

In the Now. In the shared Field. As it is. With no alteration and projection from your part.

The pleasure and suffering are not yours. This energy doesn’t belong to you. Those are the resources you take from the field. From our collective forest. There is no wood without the forest.

You need to be mindful of what you do with the resources you take from the forest and how you handle them. What kind of fire you make and why. What do you create out of it?

You need to master the suffering and pleasure. Not the relief and denial.

You are here to make fires, not perish the wood.

You are here to create, not to run away from it.

You are here to enjoy.

Not to serve.